"Gather 'round, lads and lasses! Gather 'round! Remember: in a pirate ship, in pirate waters, in a pirate world, ask no questions. Believe only what you see. No -- Believe half of what you see."
Avast, ye lubbers! This bein' the 3rd annual International Talk Like A Pirate Day an' all, heave to and belay all orders but these:
Fetch the grog and salt pork from the galley! Grab the nearest yardarm! Man the DVD player! Load! Watch The Crimson Pirate!
Aye, this movie's awash in pirate lingo. I'll wager a month's ration o' rum that no finer piratical picture ever sailed the Spanish Main. There be all kind of swashbuckling and buccaneering from beginning to end, plus yer more unusual pirate movie elements includin' hot air balloons, submarines, nitroglycerine bombs and the Captain in drag.
Last but not least, ye'll be fixing yer spyglass on some very fine piratical eye-candy.
Now, ye can spy a fleet o' other jolly jack tars on the silver screen. Some o' me own favorites bein':
Cap'n Jack Sparrow
Captain Peter Blood
the Dread Pirate Roberts
Long John Silver
...but they're all barnacled bilge rats compared to
Cap'n Vallo an' his scurvy crew.
Now, if ye only knows Burt Lancaster from the likes o' his latter-day roles in Field o' Dreams or classics like Birdman o' Alcatraz, ye might not be acquainted with how he looked back in the early days o' his career.
Take a gander at 'im in 1952. Aye, now I've never bin one t'drool over the musclebound mateys, but if he was to ask me to 'prepare to be boarded' ... Shiver me timbers! Hoist the jolly roger!
...Even in a dress he's a right ...umm... proud beauty! Well, actually I thinks I likes him better without the dress.
May all ye lubbers have a safe and festive TLAP Day.
This post also appears over here. Arrrrrrrr!