Thursday, February 28, 2002

Nearing 40

Emily's post amazes me. I think back to what I was doing at 15. Besides riding my horse and wondering why my life had taken the various turns it had by then, I don't remember doing much else meaningful. Sure, I had the occasional crush. The rants at my parents. A burgeoning love of poetry and art. But really, I had no where near the maturity and poise of Emily. I wonder, if we'd had weblogs back then--or access to this web of conversations we have today--how different would we have been, this generation of women who grew up offline? And what of these young women who are developing in tandem with this amazing new connected world. Maturing their realworld selves simultaneously with their online selves. Emily, how do you keep your head from simply exploding?

I guess I'm asking myself that same question as I skate down the last bump of my third decade, spending much of my time in the online world. I feel a bit like I'm a teenager myself. And as much as I hated it then, I'm liking it now. I'm finding my way, a little shaky and gawky, but then there's the thrill. That ecstatic rush of becoming someone. You know? In that way, I don't think age is the same yardstick online as it is in the realworld. Here, we're all finding ourselves. We all fall, get up again, push on. We share common struggles. And it continues to amaze me every single day.

post on.
j.

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