Wednesday, December 24, 2003

Beware of bothersome gifts

Tuesday, while cleaning out closets, I took a tour of gift blunders. Some were things people have mistakenly given me. Others items I bought as potential gifts but never got around to matching up with recipients. Though I've made my share of mistakes, there are people who have me beat.

LONGMONT, Colo. (AP) - Gary and Karri Clark haven't forgotten their second Christmas together. He knew she wanted bathroom accessories, so he wrapped up a couple of gifts and waited.

The toilet seat and towel rack didn't go over too well.

``Here I thought I was doing good,'' he recalled with a laugh. ``It was something she can always use, day after day. It's the gift that keeps on giving.''

The Clarks were among those who responded to requests by the Daily Times-Call newspaper to share their stories about bungled gifts and best intentions - the waffle makers, blenders and vacuum cleaners given with love and practicality in mind that will never be forgotten or forgiven.

Karri Clark admits she wanted a new toilet seat a decade ago because there was a crack in the old one. She just didn't think she'd get one gift wrapped.

``I could not believe it,'' she said. ``What man gives you a toilet seat for Christmas?''

. . .Gary Clark admits his bathroom gifts were out of desperation: It was Christmas Eve, he was at Kmart and he couldn't think of what to buy his wife.

``She wanted it, but not for Christmas,'' he said. Since then, he's done better: His wife received a Ford Explorer for her birthday this year.

Fellows (and any boneheaded women, too) hold off on anything having to do with the elimination. Yes, I know there are some really big collections of toilet paper in very pretty colors, but. . . .

Meanwhile, I need to unload kids' softwear, 100 percent wool sweaters and several SLR camera/binocular sets.

Note: This item will also appear at Mac-a-ro-nies.

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